Those unworthy of our sacrifice

I am often asked by our non-law enforcement friends and family if I am scared of my husband's job, if I am scared every day when he goes to work. my answer is always no.  I think they assume i don't love my husband or that I am under the impression that he is not in danger,  neither of these is true.  I am very much in love with my husband and I grew up in a law enforcement family, I am very much aware of the danger my husband is in.  As a child I remember every single funeral of every single officer that was killed in our state. I remember the news footage of a young wife, carrying one child in her pajamas and holding another by the hand while running into the hospital to see their dying father. My children are the very young and every time I look at them when my husband is at work I see that memory and think how easily that could be us. I also am very much aware that my husband being murdered is not the only danger to him,  I grew up visiting a police officer whose life was shattered when he was shot in the head.  We watched as his wife left him, his life fell apart and he was barely able to function, he passed away 20 years later from the wound suffered by that gunshot.  I remember my father being covered in road rash after being drug by a car.  I see the long recoveries from officers in our departments who have been shot or ran over and their lives and families are never the same.

I will, just like my father did, expose my children to the death and destruction this job leaves and the hate inflicted by those they try to protect because it has taught me to cherish every moment.  It taught me patriotism, because although there was hate there were also the very ordinary citizens who lined the street at every funeral.  They took time off of work, they brought their children out of school and they taught them what a hero looked like.  They taught them what was good about this country, and every time I saw that I thought that this country is worth it.  If I lost my dad it was worth it because every day he made a difference, he protected a child who needed protecting. And as I chose a police officer for a husband, I have always felt that.  I am a strong patriot of this amazing country, I could never share my life with someone who did not have a deep sense of sacrifice, duty, honor and patriotism that my husband does.  The love I feel for my country has always washed any fear I have away, because this country is worth it.

The last few months have hardened my heart, because the ordinary citizens no longer stand beside us.  People I was considered friends are teaching their children to put their hands up at the first sight of a police officer.  Really?? Is that where we are at?? Is this country so afraid of consequences that we are no longer teaching our children that life has consequences?  That very adult decisions, no matter the age of the person, have very adult like consequences?  Today I was sent a picture of "protestors" who threw paint of the memorial at the Denver Police Memorial. To date, Denver Police Officers have sacrificed 68 of their own to greater good.  These are not just numbers, they are 68 shattered families who have paid the ultimate cost.  This is one department in the sea of thousands who have sacrificed their fathers, their mothers, their children.  After the last year, I wonder constantly if this country is worth it.  If we will ever get to a point when the ordinary citizens will no longer sit down and allow our heroes to be spat on the way that they are, if they will continue to allow the country to spiral out of control.  This country is a disgrace for the way we have treated our veterans, our soldiers and our officers.  I hope that if my family pays the ultimate sacrifice that this country once again feels the need to be worth it, to be worthy of every soldier that has laid down their life for it, for every police officer and fireman who has paid the ultimate sacrifice.

"And so my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." John F. Kennedy Inauguration Address, January 1961